If there has been a theme running through this blog and my life, it’s probably been balance. When I was in school I was trying to balance classes, work, internships, family time, study time, friend time, and the shiny unicorn of adulthood I’ve come to know as me time.
But now, for the first time since I was in pre-school, I’m not a student. The thing I’m starting to realize is that I’m in the weird place of in-betweenness (I’m making that a word for now). I’m not in school, but I will be (hopefully) in the near future. I’m working, but only on the weekends until I start my second job. I have things that need to be done, but none of them seem to be accompanied with any sense of urgency.
So I’ve spent the last month resting. In this time I’ve spent more time with my family and friends. I’ve allowed myself to spend a little too much time reading and watching YouTube videos. I’ve allowed myself to take some time to breathe after one of the most challenging semesters of my undergraduate education.
This time to rest has been energizing, but I can’t relax forever. But there isn’t really anything demanding my time and attention in this moment. All I really need to do right now is wait.
And in this place of waiting I find myself reaching for a sense of purpose and balance, but my grip isn’t quite tight enough. I thought trying to balance an endless list of tasks and relationships was hard, but I’m finding that balancing these things when I am the one who decides what needs to be done is actually a lot harder.
Being an adult is weird and I’m still learning how to function properly, but I think I’m excited to see what I can do with this time. I don’t want to do nothing, and I know I can’t do everything. So I think for now I’m going to focus on finding meaning in the waiting. I don’t know what that’s supposed to look like, but I’m ready to see what happens.
Comment Question: How do you achieve balance in your life? Do you work best with a routine, or do you prefer flexibility? I’m curious to hear how you’ve mastered the wonderful and scary phenomenon of adulthood.